I Am Different

I am different, not like 2 Chains different, but I have changed. I am a different person.

Almost a year ago I decided to really follow God, I mean really follow. I decided to let go of my wants, desires, hopes, and dreams and follow his will for my life. I had a lot of hopes and big dreams but I realized none of what I wanted was important if I wasn’t living in the will of God. At first, I was fearful, I didn’t know what to expect. Would I be tested like Job, would I fall short of God’s glory, would I never live the life I desired, or would the devil come after my children (my biggest fear).

I knew with this new journey that I was about to embark on I was going to be tested, I just didn’t know what that looked like. On this journey I have lost so much but my attitude, as hard as it was, was it’s going to be okay God is control. Overtime I started to see a change, I feel conflicted when I curse, some of the things I use to enjoy irritates me, I work hard to have meaningful relationships, and I seek God in all I do. My conversations with God are different and I listen more for his voice.

With this journey came many other changes, I constantly seek God’s presence. I am constantly reading my bible so that I can better understand. I share my experiences no matter how crazy they may seem. When I say I know God and I love God I feel it now and I mean it. I worry less, stress less, and argue less because I know God is in control. He goes before me and make crooked places straight and he prepares a table before my enemies.

The biggest change that I experienced and the one that I cherish the most is with my faith. I used to say God can do the impossible because it sounded good, now I know without a shadow of a doubt that He can do the impossible, that he still performs miracles. I have so much faith in God it has become contagious, my children are believing that God is going to answer all our prayers. My husband no longer says if, but when. My friends believe. This is so amazing to me. My daughter, 7 years old, talks about God more than I do.

I am different, and it is amazing. I love what God is doing in my life and I pray he continues to use me. The journey was hard in the beginning, but it made me conscious of my behaviors and I have a joy and a peace that surpasses all understanding, and for that I am so grateful. I am human I have my days, but in those days, I feel God’s gentle correction and that is so special to me.

If you have had an experience with God that you would like to share, I would love to read about it in the comments below.